Alternative Consulting Jobs

Many companies are downsizing leaving professionals to fend for themselves. Many have turned to consulting as a way to pay the bills.

Consultants are doing what managers were paid to do in the nineties: provide information and guidance for companies or individuals with problems.

These days, you may be surprised to know what many consultants are working with average people to improve their situations as well.

Some alternative consultants ads we have seen lately include:

Dog Wedding Consultant- For a percentage of the overall cost of the wedding, these professionals will design wedding gowns and tuxedos, order a photographer, cake and flowers, set up and tear down, occasionally scoop, and sometimes even provide a bride or groom for your lonely pooch. Many are even ordained ministers and will perform the service as well.

Closet Consultant- No, these are not fashion friendly folks who have yet to come out to Mom and Dad. Closet consultants analyze, redesign and often build a closet to match your need. Need a wall of shoes and a 12 foot ceiling rack for those belts and purses? Call a closet consultant!

Surveillance Consultants: They are like private detectives who make you do all the work! Hire a surveillance consultant to tell you where to put your video equipment, how to hide from someone you are spying on, what angle is best for taking photos of a sneak, and the places spouses go to cheat. Ever wanted to be a detective? A surveillance consultant can teach you the basics.

Personality Consultant: Have you been told your style resembles a used dish rag? It’s time for a personality consultant. Professionals in this field will find out what you have to work with using a series of questionnaires and build on what you have. If you want a complete makeover they can supply that too. Go from housewife to “In Da House” by choosing a hip-hop style or from gross to Goth with the essentials these consultants provide. Note to parents: Thankfully, “Goth to Great” is also available.

And weirdest of all:

Funky Funeral Consultant: Dreaming of going to the next world in a flame painted coffin wired with pyrotechnics that plays the ACDC song “Highway to Hell”? How about a coffin wrapped in a plain brown wrapper with the worlds Return to Sender Stenciled on the side? These people can arrange that. Funky Funeral consultants put the “fun” in funeral. If you can dream it they can design it, so why not seal your life the way you lived it. We’re all going to go sometime!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


six + 6 =