Screw Kappa Napa: A Wine Review

Screw Kappa Napa: The clever name of Donald Sebastiani and Sons great cheap bottle of wine.

The first thing you notice about this wine, which can be found at Trader Joe’s and other retailers, is the name: Screw Kappa Napa. It draws you in as you try to understand what exactly it means. As you draw closer, you notice that the top of the bottle is not corked with a traditional wine cork, but is instead “screwed.” There is an orange screw cap sealing the bottle. This is a great idea and one that seems to be gaining popularity.

The next thing you notice is the picture on the bottle’s label. It is a corkscrew with angel’s wings and a halo over its head, floating into heaven as it has been rendered dead by the screw cap. The bottle looks good.

The next thing you notice about the wine is the price: a meager $3.99 for a bottle. Because I am lacking in funds and always looking for a good deal on booze, I was compelled to pick up a bottle of the Chardonnay when I found it.

The winemaker for “Three Loose Screws” (as owner Don Sebastiani refers to his company), Richard Bruno, has this to say about the Screw Kappa Napa 2004 Chardonnay: “It is a medium straw color with aromas of passion fruit, guava and mango with a light toast of vanilla from French oak. The sweet pear and tangerine palate is layered with light caramel, ripe Fuji apples, dusted with cinnamon and cloves.”

That sounds like a good bottle of wine to me. I do not know much about the classifications or the vocabulary of wine. The only thing I know about a bottle of wine is if it tastes good to me. And that is what really matters about what you drink.

I took my bottle home, chilled it for thirty minutes while I threw a salmon filet on the barbecue grill, then placed it on my kitchen counter. I effortlessly unscrewed the cap (thinking something to this effect: wowâÂ?¦what a good ideaâÂ?¦how cleverâÂ?¦screw corkscrews!) and poured myself a glass. I walked out to my balcony, glass in hand, to check on my salmon. It was sizzling and smoking. I spritzed it with a lemon wedge and watched the juice cook into the meat. I took a sip of wine. I immediately liked what I tasted. It was fruit through and through from the first sip to the aftertaste. It’s strong citrus taste, however, was cut by a slightly smoky finish.

I decided I would buy two more bottles of Screw Kappa Napa Chardonnay the next time I went to the store, because I knew the bottle I had would not last too far into the next day. I continued to sip from my glass as I grilled my dinner and enjoyed the cool fall southern California dusk.

On the back of the bottle, a caption reads: “As an old tradition passes, a new one begins. Screwcap closures ensure that each bottle of the finest Napa Valley Fruit matures as the Great Winemaker above intended.” It goes on to say that the Screw Kappa Napa chardonnay has honeysuckle and toasted vanilla flavors, is full of tropical fruit tastes, and finishes with a touch of smoke and caramel apple flavors.

Caramel Apple flavors? That’s interesting. I didn’t taste that, but it’s interesting.

I sat down to eat with a fresh glass of wine. Overall, I really like this wine. I think you cannot go wrong with something that tastes good and only costs around four bucks. This wine is a steal.

The winemaker recommends the Screw Kappa Napa chardonnay with lobster, grilled wild salmon, or fresh fruit and almonds.

Maybe this wine is not as good as I think it is. Maybe it’s $3.99 for a reason. Maybe I was enchanted and coerced by the warm and effective marketing of this bottle: the clever name, the even cleverer picture on the label, and the seemingly happy-go-lucky attitude of its makers.

Actually�Screw that! This wine is cheap, tasty, and has a screw cap. Overall, a good bottle of wine.

For more information on Screw Kappa Napa wine, visit the company webpage.

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