One should always say their condolences to the grieving family. Say kind words about the deceased. Don’t stress upon the how and what of the death. The family is already sad; they do not want to relive the pain. Offer a shoulder or a warm embrace. Sometimes a small gesture goes a long way. Also the love you offer will help the family move on and deal with the loss of their loved one.
If the arrangements have not already been done see what you can do in preparing for the funeral. Maybe you could help with the casket or the perhaps preparing the final resting place of the deceased. Sometimes even taking care of the caterers is help enough.
Always be ready to offer help to the grieving family even beyond the preparations of the funeral service. Attend to the little details and get any and all tasks done that are within your capabilities. Do not wait for tasks to be assigned to you. If possible take charge and get things done in order to ease things for the deceased’s family as much as possible.
Attend to the guests. The grieving families have much on their mind and are often sitting quietly at funerals leaving guests unattended. Be sure to mingle and offer guests food; though, remember it is not a party.
Make sure your mannerism is neither too morbid nor too glee. Certain etiquettes and decorum go with funerals and you should be mindful of this fact at all times. Do NOT crack inappropriate jokes nor should you laugh a lot. Shed a few tears but don’t worry the grieving family by bawling like a baby. The fact remains that their loss is greater than yours.