Death is a universal truth and no one can change this fact. It is one of the painful experiences of life when all of a sudden you come to know that someone you love a lot will be dying soon due to a specific disease. The one, who has been as vigorous as you, is now losing his or her sparkle, or they are about to.
It hurts and seems impossible to recover from the pain you're going through. It really pinches to see your loved ones going through the most difficult but unchangeable phase of life. It obviously hurts when you feel that you cannot protect them besides the great improvements in the field of medical.
At the same time, many questions will be revolving in your mind. What will life be like without your loved one who is dying? How will you face and say to that person? What will you talk about when you meet him or her or what should you not talk about? How should you act?
The best thing you can do is, ACCEPTING the reality that you have to face the situation in any case. Rather than wasting the remaining time in crying, giving up or resisting, isn’t it better to face this reality of universe with courage? No doubt, it is very difficult and painful, but you do not have any other option. Secondly, muster the courage to best help the dying person. Help him or her in enjoying the remaining specific period of life as much as they can. Let them take away some of the best memories of their life.
Convince the dying person
The most difficult task is to convince the dying person. Simply hold the hand of the dying person, hug them, kiss them and encourage him or her to put together some courage to face the fact of death. Ask him or her that everyone has to die one day so why not to enjoy the time you have to make it one of the best times of your life. You can quote your own example that even you do not have any guarantee of your life that when your breath stop. Another best example can be, “isn’t it better to know about your death in advance as compared to sudden death.” At least you have time to wind up the pending things and to enjoy life at it’s fullest.
Give time to the dying person
The moment a person come to know that he or she is dying, they become sensitive. Therefore, you really have to deal them with care and affection. Give them as much time and care as you can. Do not leave them unaccompanied, as loneliness gives birth to hundred questions and make the dying period more hurting for the already suffering person.
Review the happy times you have spent together
Hold the hand of the dying person, and speak of the happy and best time that you both have spent and shared together. The best moments of life for you can be some celebrations and the joys you have experienced together. Never forget to share and let the dying person know that how much you love him or her.
Listen to the dying person
Keep your fear of losing your loved one to yourself, and listen to them carefully. Let them talk about their wishes, pending projects, and their concerns about family, or business etc. Moreover, assure him or her that you have true feelings for them so they can trust you to share the secrets of their life, if any. However, make sure not to share the information with any one if it is communicated in confidence.
Help the dying person in settling their pending issue
Offer assistance to the dying person in setting down his or her unsettled issues. For example, resolving a dispute with a friend or family member or re-establishing contact with someone. Do as much as possible to fulfill last wishes of the dying person if they are genuine and possible for you to accomplish.
Connect to the dying person by the gift of touch
Touch and hearing are said to be the two senses a dying person retains longest. Therefore, the most excellent and heart-touching gift you can provide the dying person with is the gift of “touch.” Yes, your nonverbal communication can say as much to the dying person as your verbal, or even more. Get closer to them, hold their hand, and touch their arm or shoulder or head. Moreover, you can stroke them, massage them, and hug them.
Offer some comfort measures to the dying person
Make sure that the dying person is taking the medicines on time and going for checkups properly. If you do not have time to look into these activities, then simply hire a nurse to take care of these tasks and to provide pain management. Buy a special mattress for the dying person in order to lessen the pressure or pain. If the dying person is incontinent, make sure to keep him or her clean and dry all the time.
Promise the dying person
If you have close friendship with the person who is dying, then the most comforting gift for him or her can be your promise to take care of their family or business in their absence. Make them a promise that you will be there for his or her family through the ups and downs of life and will never leave them alone.
And of course, there is the power of “prayers”
Least but not the least, keep faith and believe in God and your prayers. As you offer your prayers with all your heart, not only does God hear to you, but the living spiritual being you are praying for hears as well. Conduct sacred practices according to your religion that you think will work for the dying person.