Allow Me to Introduce Myself

Since this is my first article on Associated Content, I decided this would be a good place to tell you a bit about myself. It will serve as a good starting point for the pieces I’ll write later. As this is an unpaid article, it shall also serve as the guinea pig for posting my work on this site – if you can read this, you can safely assume I managed to figure it all out somehow.

I am in my late forties, February-born in upstate NY. This would make me a Pisces, and worse yet, a Piscean Pig if one follows the Chinese astrological system. Surprisingly, it’s pretty accurate; I tend to be emotionally driven, perceptive and artistic. I also tend to be perceived as a doormat. That doormat stuff doesn’t cut it with me, so if you’re thinking of tricking me into washing your car or loaning you some money, forget it.

When asked about my spiritual beliefs, I state that I am Hindu. Yes, I know … I’m a white guy. How many white guys do you know who are Hindu? Not many, I’ll wager. My biggest problem seems to be that no one believes me, and the problem is escalated when speaking to someone from the Middle East or Asia who doesn’t happen to be Hindu themselves. ‘You can’t be Hindu!’, they’ll say. Let me straighten you folks out right now: there are lots of things I can’t be, such as physically immortal, in two places at once, or pregnant. I can be Hindu.

No, my name is not actually Ghosty Twofish. I have a real name (imagine that!) that has meaning to me and my family, and I’m intensely proud of it. I didn’t get one of these idiotic names modern Western parents give their kids that are simply oddball spellings of normal-sounding names, or worse yet, made-up ethnic-sounding names which have no meaning in America or anywhere else in the world. Sadly, I don’t get to tell you the story of my real name, because that would sort of defeat the purpose of using a pen name. Someone would figure it all out, and we can’t make things too obvious.

I can tell you about my pen name though, as it’s one I’ve used for a number of years. I am an avid player (and writer concerning) the game Ultima Online, a massively multiplayer game set in a pseudo-medieval world with dragons, mages and the gamut of clichÃ?©s indicative of that genre. When your character dies in the game, you become a ghost until you find a way to get resurrected somehow. One day, when I was still quite new to the game, another player killed me and, in a sort of twisted kindness, opened a magical gate to the nearest town, saying ‘come along, little ghosty’. For whatever reason, it stuck.

The ‘Twofish’ part is simple enough; I’m a Pisces. It seemed to make for a good last name, so I tacked it on and I’ve used it ever since. See? A simple story. I sure wish I could tell you the one about my real name, it’s much more meaningful.

So, I play Ultima Online, and I’m a middle-aged Piscean with who has what he perceives is a cool real name and a semi-cool Internet moniker, who happens to be Hindu. What else is there? Well, as you might imagine, I have an interest in philosophy and literature (I’m pretty selective on the latter, preferring Shakespeare, Poe, T.S. Eliot, H.P. Lovecraft, Issac Asimov and Piers Anthony). I consider myself a political conservative, and let me mention that I am registered as an independent, so don’t even think about giving me a hard time about being a Republican, because, officially, I’m not one. Just letting you know.

Well, I suppose that’s enough for now. Stop on back from time to time, as I’ll have something a little more substantial to say; this whole writing-about-me thing isn’t my bag.


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