So after learning my son reacted horribly to dairy in January, breaking out in a full body skin rash with hard alligator skin patches, I have changed quite a bit in the diets of my two children. My son is completely dairy free after reacting to yogurts, cheeses and even raw cow and goat milk. I moved him to almond milk and he took to it exceptionally well considering the little prince does not like change. It was easier to move my daughter to the almond milk since I was already buying it. Imagine my delight when the patches of scaly red eczema on her cheeks that has plagued her for years all but disappeared! She has since moved almost dairy free, but still has small patches on her arms and legs…which leads me into the buckwheat.
After reading how processed foods were killing us all, I began the big step of making my own bread. My mom supplied me the book Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day, and let me tell you that it was the easiest homemade bread I have ever made. It was easier than putting it in a bread maker and my husband and children loved it! Then came the articles stating how wheat is going to kill us all and one side of my brain was thinking that I really didn’t do anything better because my bread was still GMO wheat, and the other side was saying just give up, all food is deadly now. Even so, I began noticing how much of the genetically modified toxin my children were eating. Wheat is also a big allergen trigger, so I began wondering if the rest of my daughter’s skin problem was a wheat reaction.
My sister, Noelle, who has moved much farther into the realm of healthy eating than I, began sending me messages and emails about flour alternatives. They looked delicious, exotic and expensive. In one section was a list of possible fours to buy. I took a mental note and scoured my local discount grocery store. Much to my surprise, I found an $8 bag of pure healthy living called buckwheat flour. Amazing! I had a gluten and wheat free alternative sitting right in my local discount store! I was laying precious natural medicine in the cart and now I was ready to scour google for the finest in buckwheat recipes.
So just a few weeks ago, I finally had time to cook and work the oven without my 18 month son wrapped between my legs. As he napped, I looked all over for great buckwheat recipes. Yes! Five star rated bread! Show me your golden ingredients! What? Wheat? That’s no good at all. I don’t want half a cup of buckwheat to 2 cups of GMO death wheat, I want ALL buckwheat. That was a little harder to find. And it was even harder to find one with ingredients that I had in the house. No, I do not readily carry Xanthan gum in the kitchen. The one I settled on one was so easy. Flour, eggs, baking powder and water. Excellent! I texted my sister with excitement, thinking I found the holy grail of easy breads. She couldn’t wait to see what I thought, though it wasn’t for the reason I assumed. She already knew the truth. There’s a reason buckwheat bread is mixed with wheat. It was awful. The loaf didn’t smell like something savory and baked. I tasted it anyway and texted her the bad news. She replied that she didn’t think it was that tasty to begin with and once bought buckwheat honey that was so bad that she had to return it. Now if you don’t know Noelle, this is amazing. She has an iron stomach and will eat anything so it doesn’t go to waste. And SHE said it tasted like butt.
“Haha, butt honey,” I texted back.
Even so, I was still determined to salvage this super food of breads. The recipe used the same concept of banana bread, so I modified it. Sweet vanilla almond milk instead of water, maple syrup, honey, cinnamon and my best home canned applesauce that was so perfect and sweet that not a lick of sugar was needed in its creation. That’s enough natural sugar to please my taste buds. The second loaf looked delicious, but that buckwheat overpowered everything! I’d have to add heaping cups of refined sugar, the evil cocaine-like substance that is going to kill us all, for my children to even touch this stuff. I had more sweet ingredients in that batter than flour! How was this possible? I texted the bad news to Noelle. It was edible, but I’ve-only-eaten-dirt-ever-in-my-life-and-I’m-starving kind of edible.
She laughs, “no wonder it’s available at the discount outlet. It’s right up there with the buttwheat honey! Come on,” she says, “you know buttwheat is awesome! Admit it. Word of the DAY right there.”
Okay, Noelle, I admit it. Buttwheat is a much more fitting term.
Then she asks how much I have left. Three quarters of the buttwheat bag glares back at me. Too much. Time for google, she texts. But I was on google! I don’t think you can bypass the butt in the wheat!
And guess what? You can’t. Without death wheat or death sugar.
As a nice followup, I got one final text from Noelle trying a microwave heated vest just a couple days after my baking disaster. “Smelly!” She comments. “What’s on the fabric label…buckwheat! Buttwheat strikes again!!”
So does anyone want some buckwheat flour? I have a bag Ã?Â¾ full.