Mary J Blige . . . From Drama to Stardom

Mary J Blige seems to always be at the top of the charts garnering praise and awards. Not many people know what it took for her to get..and stay there. Ms. Blige not only had to master her craft, she had to learn to master herself as well. Early successes were marred by reports of unprofessional outbursts and unreliabilty. There were many who said Mary J. Blige might become a “flash in the pan”. They predicted she would have her “five minutes of fame” and then fade away, but not because of lack of talent. Just when it seems they might be right, Mary J. Blige proved them all wrong.

First I will say that what I write is not speculation. Mary J. Blige has herself, openly and forthrightly spoken of the situations I am about to relay. She seems happy to share how she changed her life and has not been shy about sharing how bad her life had gotten. Rather than try to hide the problems she encountered, she has spoken of how telling her story might benefit others.

The Mary J Blige one encounters today seems calm, cool and collected. Above all, she seems happy. “Well, why shouldn’t she be happy?”, some might ask. She has success. That Is true but there was a time when Mary J. Blige had both success and misery.

To hear her tell it, her hard won accolades did not make it any easier to face the person in the mirror .She was at the top of her profession but still dangerously unhappy. In fact, at one point there was so much acrimony between Ms. Blige and the man who had helped her achieve fame, P Diddy, that thier collaboration was ended. With her career and her future hanging in the balance, Mary J Blige decided to change her life.

Mary J Blige credits three things with saving her life : God, self acceptance and sobriety. Many know that the entertainment industry, with it’s frequent parties and events, offers many opportunites to overdo. Ms. Blige does not blame environment though, she freely admits that she had a problem with substances long before she began getting invited to industry soirees. It seems that she had turned to drugs and alcohol to help her avoid dealing with the pains of the past and they had become her coping mechanisms.

Growing up with modest means and and an insecure home life left Mary J Blige with issues that needed to be addressed. Liike many, she turned on herself, blaming herself for her inner demons and unhappiness, turning to substances to deal with her anger and pain. She admits she did not like herself very much at this time and that she acted out her feelings with self destruction and anger aimed at others. Outburts and missed appointments led to angry confrontations with those around her..and many began to think that perhaps working with her simply was not worth all the drama.

Mary J. Blige now sings one of her most popular songs saying that “no more drama in our lives” is cause for celebration. She says that doing away with substance useage in her life led her to self examination and acceptance. She credits a renewed faith in God for helping her learn to value herself and others. Gone are the days of missed appointments and on set tantrums, Mary J Blige does not need them anymore. Happily married and at the top of the charts Mary J blige is mostly importantly, a friend to herself. If you listen you will always hear her thank God for turning her life around.

But personally, I think self awareness and courageous self examination had a lot to do with it too. With a superb voice and the will to inspire others Mary J Blige saved both her career and her own life. Now she encourages others to learn to accept and love themselves as they are whenever she has the chance to speak out about addiction. Having overcome her personal demons, she continues to be one of the most popular R and b singers on the scene.

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