Scientology vs. Satanism: Which is the Bigger Blight?

INTRO:
First off I would like to say that although I technically don’t answer to any religion, I consider myself more Christian than anything. Second I’d like to state that all religions are somewhat crazy. Every belief system has its parts that make us (or at least the ones who don’t follow blindly) scratch our heads, but Scientology and Satanism are “religions” that are beyond crazy, and what’s crazier still is that they have followers. First I’ll analyze each so that everyone is on the same page.

SATANISM:
This little religion/philosophy was developed by Anton Szandor LaVey in 1966 (LaVey was 36). He proceeded to publish “The Satanic Bible” in 1969 followed by several other books based on Satanism and the occult. Most people though misunderstand Satanism. Most Satanists don’t worship Satan or any diety for that matter. They do believe that supernatural powers and beings have influence in our lives, but they do not subject to any form of worship. Satanism isn’t as crazy as most people think, although it is based on VERY selfish principles. Satanists revel in the human animal and choose to embrace feelings such as lust, revenge, and pride rather than condemn them. They believe this things are natural and that humans shouldn’t be embarraced of what we are at our core, and they do have a point.

Now the downside. These beliefs are very alluring and we would all love to act on our own selfish and natural impulses. The problem though is that this way of living would make for an unstable daily life. If we all just did what we wanted without worrying about others or the consequences the world would fall into chaos. The scary part is while people don’t label themselves as followers, they are followers in terms of their lifestyle. Humans grow more selfish, lustful, and violent every day, and this is somewhat frightening as it follows the Revelation to John in the Christian Bible. The other downside is their religious ceremony known as the Black Mass. This ceremony is bizarre, hateful, and boderline insane. Physcologically it is very unhealthy as it causes people to dwell on the people and things they hate and envision those things being destroyed.

While misunderstood by most, Satanism gives no structure or rules to life. While some followers do choose to adopt some kind of moral code, it mostly advocates to do what you want because you want to. Not a good thing for the individual or society.

SCIENTOLOGY:
Everyone’s heard of this, errrr, unique “religion.” Started by science fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard in 1952, scientology has grown to have a fairly large following worldwide, including many famous celebrities. It’s basic tennants include many bizarre beliefs including condemning pschiatry (although anyone who follows this definetly needs phychiatric help, if not a padded room), the belief that humans are eternal beings called thetans who have lived past lives even on other planets, and for a one time fee and years of auditing Scientology can make you truly happy.

Where to start? First off, say it with me, SCIENCE FICTION. I don’t know about you, but if a science fiction writer tried to tell me about how psychology is evil and with their help I can have super powers as long as I distance myself from family and friends who don’t share my beliefs I’d kick him and run away. This…whatever it is is so insane, bizarre, and stupid that if I was given the choice between this or joining the Heaven’s Gate people, I’d go with the latter. They say that psychology/psychiatry is evil and responsible for things like World War I and the September 11th attacks, but let’s look their special process called auditing. You hold onto these metal rods that send electricity through your body (sounds fun, right?) while somebody asks you questions to help you work through past traumatic events. That sounds eerily familiar to psychology, which they say is abusive and dangerous. I don’t even want to get into their belief in aliens, the Intergalactic Federation, and the evil Lord Xenu.

Even more fun are the celebrities that have fallen into the pit of pure insanity. There’s Tom Cruise who acted like a monkey on cocaine on Oprah, Isaac Hayes who played Chef on South Park until they made fun of Scientology (it was okay to make fun of every religion except for his own, and the episode had to be banned following threats to Viacomm that Tom Cruise wouldn’t promote Mission Impossible III), and Jenna Elfman who recently yelled the question “Do you rape babies?!?” at director John Roeker in downtown L.A. for wearing a “Scientology is Gay” t-shirt. While very entertaining, somehow they don’t seem to be very good at casting their religion in a positive light.

ANALYSIS:
Do I HAVE TO? Okay. This is a no brainer. While both are crazy the answer is clear and a little scary. Scientology is slowing down the progress of mankind. The fact that people are actually dumb or desperate enough to actually follow these wackos scares me more than the fulfilling of apocalyptic prophecies. The main point I want people to take away though is to actually think about what you believe in. Both of these make nice claims but neither deliver (Satanism says you can do what you want, which you can’t; Scientology says they’ll give you magic powers, but they don’t). All religions have their own areas that are a little out there, but at least they don’t make wild claims that they can’t fulfill. It is my hope that this stage of religious insanity is just another phase in history (think of the Crusades, thow shalt not kill unless they’re not Christian), and that soon some giant supernatural hand will come down and smack all these people back to reality.

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