Why do people place ads in the Missed Connections section of the classifieds? I mean, seriously, this is a mystery I’ve been pondering for quite some time now. I mean, let’s look at it logically. Say you saw some sexy blonde Barbie like woman (except her body is proportionate as opposed to anorexic) driving a bright red Ferrari in traffic. She cut you off and as pissed as you were for her rudeness, there was something sexy about her hostility. You try to follow her out but she enters some gated rich tight ass community and you know with your filthy paint peeling pinto that that asshole gate renta-cop would never let you in there without a membership sticker.
But this girl had something about her you couldn’t let go. So you do the next best thing, and by far the most promising. Missed Connections. Craigslist. You place your post with anonymous email address and type up a righteous gentlemanly solicitation. It reads: sexy blonde who cut me off- in traffic today around 6:30pm on the intersection of cherry street and sugar avenue. You have a red Ferrari with the word “Foxy” on your license plate. You know who you are. Contact me. The furious way you jutted that hotrod out in front of me, was quite the turn on looking back and I cant stop thinking of you. You looked flaming hot, a wild shrew that I’d like to tame. If you remember me in the white pinto (a rental) [SIC] contact me. I have the strangest hunch that you might just be my soul mate. Me and you, that equals two.
There. So you have an ad. But before you start trimming your pubic hair and replacing your 2 year-old crusty aerosol can of Irish Spring, there are some very important things to consider. First off Romeo, what makes you so sure that this girl even remembers you? Then, even if she does, why in the world would she go on Missed Connections, Craigslist much less any classified site and out of sheer chance, read your loser ad? Oh and who is to say she’s even familiar with Craigslist? Particularly this oddball section of it? And just for kicks, let’s say she was looking especially for you in this crazy section of la world du Craig, lets ponder over her presumed but likely character. Really what kind of person actually scours the missed connections ads, hoping and/or expecting to find something written for them.
This woman, along with the unattractive heightened confidence also known as too high self-esteem is ethnocentric to herself as if she alone represents a huge country or something. What would even possess someone to look for a letter to themselves on missed connections. Do you really want to be with someone that smug and self-assured that she knew a message for her would be waiting? Id like to think not.
But to summarize my point or rather my honest question out of sheer curiosity and bewilderment if you read this section, which admittedly I do occasionally just for a good laugh and self esteem booster, it appears as though for some surreal reason, individuals actually do seem to hook up this way or at least it seems so in viewing responses and subject titles which go back and forth.
However, upon closer inspection it has been more often than not the case that these flagrant CTP (that’s Conversations Through Posts) are really just a way for a melodramatic, pathetic couple to exploit their silly altercations for the failed attempt to give their “Fuck you, you dumb slut” some kind of worldwide attention and importance. Either that or it’s some girl who just got dumped trying one last time to embarrass her ex with pencil dick references.
And I really want to say Haha, who cares you freaking losers! But look who just dedicated a 600 word article to the entire practice. Right. And I am certain that I cannot be alone. Missed Connections, Craigslist. Secret voyeuristic obsession or pathetic pastime? HmmÃ¢Â?Â¦
Missed Connections classified ads. A popular section of many newspapers as well as the infamous Craigslist website. The notion of such a thing bewilders me to no end. What kind of desperation or egotism drives one to post a MC ad, and worse, who reads it?
Missed Connections: For Losers Or For Lovers?
Who’s more pathetic? He who places a Missed Connections ad or she who responds?
Missed Connections, a final attempt at fate?
Missed Connections ads cater to the voyeur in us all.