Women think guys do not think about marriage. However, women are wrong. Guys do think about marriage and discuss it among themselves. Just as a woman has a dream husband a guy has a dream wife. She is the ultimate idea of what a perfect wife should be.
One night my friends and I went to a sports bar. Mostly men were there. We ranged from mid 20s to mid 30s. There were a few women there with their dates. The bar is mostly a male hangout. On this particular night all of us guys were in a good social mood, gulping beer and wolfing down burgers (I, a converted health nut, consumed a veggie burger and non alcoholic beer.) We all got into a conversation about Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. Some guy said the two are engaged to be married. Then someone took a poll asking who would want to marry Kim Kardashian. One out of 43 guys rose his hand. Then it was asked who would rather fool around with Kim Kardashian instead of marrying her. All the guys rose their hands, including the one who said he would marry her.
The conversation went to discussing marriage and what the guys want the wife of their dreams to be. We came to a shocking consensus.
The perfect wife must have the perfect looks. She must be slender and shapely, no more than size 10. Her complexion must be light and clear, free of freckles, moles, and acne. Her breast must be no less than size B and no more than size C. Her facial features should be fine and cute, like Taylor Swift. Her hair must be blonde. Other hair colors are fine, but the ultimate dream bride is preferably blonde. There is something pure and feminine about a woman with blonde hair, like she is an angel or princess, or angel who is a princess.
A guy wants his super beautiful wife to be from a rich family. Rich people have money and connections. Rich parent-in-laws will buy their beautiful daughter a big house and set up a big fat trust fund for her. Rich parent-in-laws will see to it that their son-in-law will always have a job paying 6 figures. Wealthy in-laws will always have the means to provide for themselves and house themselves. The husband does not have to fear that the mother- in- law will one day move in nor a lazy brother -in- law will beg for money. The husband does not have to worry about in-laws becoming a financial burden.
Not only must the dream wife be rich and beautiful, she must have the right personality. She cannot be a bossy loud mouth. She must be quiet and soft spoken, always agreeable and support of the husbands wants.
She must maintain financial independence, working full time and buying all her, make up, clothes, shoes, bags, and jewelry with her own money. She must not be overbearing and clingy, constantly texting, emailing, and calling her husband throughout the day while he is at work or out with his friends. She will respect his privacy and not secretly check his cell phone. She will not complain about her husband spending more time with his friends than with her.
She will not nag about having children and her biological clock. The husband will be the one who decides whether or not they will have kids, and he will decide how many kids they will have.
The dream wife will keep up her appearance. She keep herself looking young and beautiful and control her weight. She must have sex with her husband on his demand. She will use birth control and not miss a pill.
She must not be a neat freak, yet she must keep the home tidy, do laundry, and do the shopping. She must not be super religious nor demand daily Bible readings and church attendance. Although, attending church on Christmas Eve and Easter Sunday is tolerable.
Thus you have the dream wife. During the whole discussion I took notes. When I went over my notes the next day I was surprised to find that guys today are no different from our father, grandfather, and great grand fathers. Like them we want the same kind of woman to be our wives. To sum it all up we want wives who are docile, submissive Barbie dolls.
Ladies, please forgive us. But when I think about it more, women contribute to men being this way. It started with our mothers. She tells us blonde hair is beautiful when she keeps her dark hair dyed blond throughout her son’s childhood. She tells him big breasts are desirable when she has breast implants. She tells her son to marry up when she shows disapproval for her son’s lower class less glamorous girlfriend when he brings her home for the family to meet. She tells him the wife is not suppose to go against her husband regardless what he does when the son sees his mother support his father in some unethical dealing nor speaks her mind when she disagrees with something.
Through entertainment and images men are encouraged to seek Barbie doll women for wives. Even though women today have more opportunities in employment, education, and entertainment, they too are promoting the stereotype of the dream wife in the way they act and in their appearance. The image of the dream wife needs to change. She needs to reflect how women really are instead of what women want to be and what men are taught how women should be.