Menopause? Empty Nest? Widowhood?

The milestones in my life are either missing entirely or all messed up.

My mom told me she never really had a menopause. Although she always thought she had cancer, which she has not yet. She said she just realized one day that she hadn’t had her period for a while. Same here. Not hot flashes, no cold chills, no problems at all! Very disappointing.

Empty Nest Syndrome. I looked forward to that. My older brother just got a new wife ane new kies to avoid it. My sister is still suffering from it ten years later. My little brother’s kids won’t leave, so he doesn’t have it. I had my kids ten years apart, and now, at the advanced age of sixty, I’m having it.

The only man I ever married, affectionately referred to as my first husband, or the father of my children, just died. We had been divorced legally for fifteen years, morally for nearly twenty. And all I can muster is a distant giggle in the back of my mind, and the thought – Good, I outlived the SOB! Not nice.

Maybe dying will live up to my expectations, although, like my Dad, I’m leaving my remains to a medical school to chop up and learn something from. I wonder if I should leave them a notel explaining what I really did to this poor old body. Distant giggle.

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