Installing a Bath-tub Spout

I hate plumbing. I have problems with the correlation of pipes, faucets, copper and water; their mutual relation is not a concept that gives me confidence. Whenever I complete any plumbing job I either make the situations worse or I have to contend with a pesky drip that after much venting I eventually get a handle on.

My latest foray into the world of water was to replace a bath-tub spout; the one that diverts water from the spout to the shower head. The old one had done its duty for seventeen years before the push/pull knob gave out. From research on the Internet and plumbing guides the job looked simple enough so I told my wife it will be a cinch. She of no confidence smiled and started to gather in the buckets.

Removing the seventeen year old spout was a problem. It was tight and I have learned in plumbing not to force anything. I ended up using a hacksaw to break down the fitting and was then able to remove it without damaging the copper pipe it was attached too. It’s this pipe that determines the type of spout to purchase. If the pipe has a screw-thread at the end then the new spout will simply screw on. If not then you must buy a spout that has an adapter. In either case purchase Teflon tape for all joints.

The new spout was gleaming and all the necessary parts to install the adapter were included in the package. You would think as most people who buy this item are gusher bandits that the instructions would be bold instead of teeny-tiny and all bunched together. As I went through the installation it became tedious each time I had to squint at the small print and flimsy exploded diagrams. Finally the spout was seated securely and I prayed as I turned on the water to test for leaks. I called out to my wife that the job was done despite the lousy instructions and she said, next time just print copy the instructions and then enlarge them. Yes, well next time.

As I was languishing on a well earned beer I heard my son shout from the bathroom; “hey Dad, when I point to hot I get cold and when I point to cold I get hot.”

“Live with it,” I shouted; well for the time being anyway.

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