How to Forgive When You Can\’t Forget

It is never easy to forgive someone who has hurt you. Forgetting what they did is even harder. However, you must realise that staying hurt and angry would affect you far more than it would affect those who made you feel this way. Your mental health would start to deteriorate and you would begin to sink deep into an ocean of misery and sorrow.

In order to regain your happiness and peace of mind, you must learn to forgive those who hurt you and move on from the pain. No doubt it is easier said than done, but if you put your heart and mind to it, you should be able to accomplish it.


  • 1

    You must offer the person who hurt you a chance to apologise. You cannot tell if they are genuinely sorry for their words and actions unless you allow them to explain themselves. They may be able to convince you that they indeed regret hurting you and offer to do anything it takes to earn your forgiveness. If that is the case, you would immediately find yourself feeling relaxed and in a forgiving mood.

  • 2

    Always remember that “to err is human, to forgive divine.” We all make mistakes at some point in life, maybe even several times a day. There is nothing wrong with slipping as that is what makes us humans. The important thing is to admit our mistakes and make amends. If the person who wronged you has realised that he/she was at fault and seeking your forgiveness, then you should do the right thing and look past their mistake(s).

  • 3

    Do not keep on thinking about the hurtful things that the person said or did. The more you let your mind wander in that direction, the greater your pain and anger would become and therefore the harder it would get for you to forgive them. While there is absolutely no reason for you to forget what the person did, your aim should be to look beyond it and resolve the issue for your own sake. Do not even think for a second that you are doing anyone a favour by forgiving them.

  • 4

    Even if you are unable to forget what a person did to hurt you, try not to bring it up again once you have resolved the issue with them.

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