Political Update: Colin Powell’s Letter to George Bush and the Groucho Marx Judge of Saddam’s Silly Little Trial

There was a watershed moment day, for serious. Senator McCain and, former Uncle Tom Supreme, Colin Powell came out against the Bush administration’s new torture tacticsâÂ?¦ Something about the Genesis Conventions, I don’t know, I think it has something to do with Genesis from The Real World: Boston, or maybe it has something to do with the Genesis game system that Sega made (On a side note, My personal favorite game for that unitâÂ?¦ Jennifer Capriati Tennis) (On a side, side note, what the hell happened to Sega?).

Basically, Bush is totally screwed. The other shoe dropped. (Did I use that saying right?) I’ve always wanted to be around for a watershed political moment. Like when they created that word ‘watershed’ during the Nixon Watergate Scandal. (By the way, do you think that was the best ‘Watershed Moment’, because it was the first and all, or do you think that it sucked because they hadn’t really perfected ‘Watershed Moments’ yet? Kind of like how Super Bowl I was a really horrible game because the AFL hadn’t really caught up to the NFL, hmmm. Just something to think about.)

I was just kidding about Colin Powell being an Uncle Tom too; he’s much more akin to Benson from the show ‘Benson’. And, is it just me, or is Senator McCain like the Good Republican? He’s like that Nazi at the end of “The Piano” who pretends he doesn’t notice Adrian Brody and then ends up becoming his friend. (That’s what happened right? That movie was so fucking boring, I can’t even remember if I watched the whole thing or not.) I feel like America is collectively like Adrian Brody and John McCain is that nice Nazi. Maybe this thing has a happy ending after all?

In other news, the judge in the Saddam Hussein trial is a dead ringer for Groucho Marx. He is the Iraqi Groucho Marx, and what’s even funnier about this story is that it turns out he’s also an aspiring comedian. Today he announced to the court that Saddam actually wasn’t a dictator; that the people of Iraq just made that up or something. For the life of me, though, I couldn’t figure out how the media was trying to spin this nugget. Were they mad at the Iraqi Groucho Marx for saying such a weird thing, or were they like giving me an invisible wink as if to say, “Sure, Iraqi Groucho Marx really thinks Saddam wasn’t a dictatorâÂ?¦not!” I honestly have no idea, which was surprisingly refreshing. It was kind of cool to take in a news story that I couldn’t process whatsoever. I felt like an alien; it felt good.

Okay, that’s it for now.

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