It happens everyday, children at the store, or at the bus stop acting totally out of control disturbing anyone standing nearby. Or maybe you have seen a parent who angrily beat a tired or sick child whose crying has annoyed their parents. Some people feel that parents should not be allowed to spank, because it can lead to brutality. A parent’s most difficult decision is how to discipline their child.
Many people including child psychologist are very opposed to parents spanking their children. Some feel that spanking teaches bad lessons, and that the stronger can rule by force and that angry violence is suitable conduct. Authorities however think differently. There has to be discipline there has to be order. It is possible for parents to create hostility and aggressiveness in their children by behaving violently themselves. However, when the child has lowered his head and clenched his fist he is daring the parent to take him on. If the parent responds appropriately (on the backside) he has taught the child a valuable lesson that is consistent with nature’s method of instruction.
But does loving discipline include a parent’s use of spanking? It can when the spanking is an expression of and in a manner consistent with love. One thing you do not want to do is spank your child when you are angry. And I am not talking about a harsh spanking, just a pat on the backside. Of course a wise parent recognizes that there are various ways to correct or punish a child. Most of the time a firm word will do just fine. When a child spills or breaks something through childish carelessness, it is more effective to make the child clean it up or work to replace it. It is important to be flexible and to discipline according to the situation and the child. What works with one may not work with another.
As children continue to grow they will again challenge their parent’s authority, testing to see if they really mean business. Even a nice child may one day say shut up. When it comes to very young children a small tap my be necessary, to help them understand who has the authority. After the tears subside it is important that the parent lovingly take the child into his or her arms, embrace them and let them know that you love them. It is also important that they understand why they were punished. This is also a good time to offer your child guidance that will reach their heart.
Everyday you can see the sad consequences of excessive and misplaced permissiveness. If you do decide to spank your child the key is firm but not harsh spankings. The brief pain of a spanking is much better that the grief that may come later on in the teenage years. Parents need to know how to control themselves so that they do not let spanking lead to child abuse. If you are a person who can not control their temper, then you should not spank your child. Being a parent is of course a very difficult job.
The final decision is up to both parents on what is the best way to discipline your child. I am not stating that spankings are the best and only way to discipline your children. It really does depend on what works best for you and for your child.